Sunday, September 14, 2008

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Warning: Editorializing Ahead



It's no secret to anyone who sees me on a daily basis that I am no fan of Sarah Palin. Yes, there is a lot of gossip about her out there. And to be fair, that stuff's personal. Like, the fact that she's against teaching sex-ed in schools and in favor of teaching abstinence despite the fact that she has a knocked-up teenage daughter has nothing to do with her policies or her ability to make executive decisions. Sure, just prior to accepting McCain's offer to be his veep she wanted someone to explain what "exactly" it is that a VP does, but do YOU know what a VP does? Didn't think so. And yeah, seems she's got a reputation for firing (or having someone else fire) persons in her life who piss her off, but really--what does abuse of power have to do with the issues? And all this stuff about an affair? I mean C'mon! Just because the day after the interwebs picked up on the rumor the man she is alleged to have the affair with filed a motion with the Alaskan courts to have his divorce papers sealed and then another motion to expediate the first motion--so what?! That could mean anything. And even if she did have an affair, that is not how we should be judging someone's ability to do their job (ahem, Bill Clinton, cough cough John Edwards).
While I am getting sick of all the gossip about her (it is getting kinda old), I will say can you fucking imagine if Barack "Hussein" Obama had a pregnant teenage daughter who's baby daddy had a myspace page that said shit like "I'm just a nigga who likes to shoot shit up" and " I don't want to have kids"?! His campaign would be OVER. But, we love hypocrisy in this country so what is good for the white goose...you know where I am going.
In any event, tawdry tidbits aside and looking to the issues only, how can anyone believe a word this bitch says? And furthermore why, for example, when someone from CNN wants someone from her camp to answer for the fact that she said she told the Feds "No thanks!" to that "Bridge to Nowhere," when it is, in fact, the opposite of what she said, instead of an answer it's just "Look out for the 'liberal media'"? What, as Jerry Seinfeld would say, is the deal with that? It boggles the mind! I've attached here an article from those most liberally biased of sources Time magazine and CNN that summarizes nicely how full of shit and hypocritical this pitbull with lipstick is. Enjoy!

Sarah Palin thinks she is a better American than you because she comes from a small town, and a superior human being because she isn't a journalist and has never lived in Washington and likes to watch her kids play hockey. Although Palin praised John McCain in her acceptance speech as a man who puts the good of his country ahead of partisan politics, McCain pretty much proved the opposite with his selection of a running mate whose main asset is her ability to reignite the culture wars. So maybe Governor Palin does represent everything that is good and fine about America, as she herself maintains. But spare us, please, any talk about how she is a tough fiscal conservative.

Palin has continued to repeat the already exposed lie that she said "No, thanks" to the famous "bridge to nowhere" (McCain's favorite example of wasteful federal spending). In fact, she said "Yes, please" until the project became a symbol and political albatross.

Back to reality. Of the 50 states, Alaska ranks No. 1 in taxes per resident and No. 1 in spending per resident. Its tax burden per resident is 2 1/2 times the national average; its spending, more than double. The trick is that Alaska's government spends money on its own citizens and taxes the rest of us to pay for it. Although Palin, like McCain, talks about liberating ourselves from dependence on foreign oil, there is no evidence that being dependent on Alaskan oil would be any more pleasant to the pocketbook.

Alaska is, in essence, an adjunct member of OPEC. It has four different taxes on oil, which produce more than 89% of the state's unrestricted revenue. On average, three-quarters of the value of a barrel of oil is taken by the state government before that oil is permitted to leave the state. Alaska residents each get a yearly check for about $2,000 from oil revenues, plus an additional $1,200 pushed through by Palin last year to take advantage of rising oil prices. Any sympathy the governor of Alaska expresses for folks in the lower 48 who are suffering from high gas prices or can't afford to heat their homes is strictly crocodile tears.

As if it couldn't support itself, Alaska also ranks No. 1, year after year, in money it sucks in from Washington. In 2005 (the most recent figures), according to the Tax Foundation, Alaska ranked 18th in federal taxes paid per resident ($5,434) but first in federal spending received per resident ($13,950). Its ratio of federal spending received to federal taxes paid ranks third among the 50 states, and in the absolute amount it receives from Washington over and above the amount it sends to Washington, Alaska ranks No. 1.

Under the state constitution, the governor of Alaska has unusually strong powers to shape the state budget. At the Republican National Convention, Palin bragged that she had vetoed "nearly $500 million" in state spending during her two years as governor. This amounts to less than 2% of the proposed budget. That's how much this warrior for you (the people) against it (the government) could find in wasteful spending under her control.

One thing Barack Obama and McCain disagree on is an oil windfall–profits tax. McCain is against it, on the theory that it is a tax and therefore bad, and also that it would discourage domestic production. Obama is for it, on the theory that if oil companies can make a nice profit when oil sells for $50 per bbl., they can still make a nice profit when it sells for more than $100, even if the government takes a bit and spreads the money around to those who are hurting from higher oil prices.

Although Palin's words side with McCain in this dispute, her actions side with Obama. Her major legislative accomplishment has been to revamp Alaska's windfall-profits tax in order to increase the state's take. Alaska calls it a "clear and equitable share" tax. The state assumes that extracting oil from the tundra costs about $25 per bbl. and takes as much as 75% of the difference between that and the sale price.

Why is a windfall-profits tax good for Alaska but not for the U.S.? Well, it's obvious, isn't it? People in Alaska are better than people in the rest of the U.S. They're more American. Although there are small towns and farms and high school hockey teams in the lower 48, there are fewer down here, per capita, than in Alaska. And there are many more journalists and pollsters and city dwellers and other undesirables who might benefit if every American had the same right to leech off the government as do the good citizens of Sarah Palin's Alaska.


Oh yeah, I forgot about the Jesus shit. Well, that's not really a big deal, though. I mean, you really can't compare scientific "theory" to a 2000 year old book written by different people and compiled at different times and edited over and over that says unicorns existed. Can you? Nah, she's probably right, God created Man and then used one of his (Adam's--he's the one dude God created) ribs to make a woman so that he could have a companion. Then they mated and so on and so on. That's how we got here. Don't know why that fact is so hard for this Darwin dude to grasp?

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Dick In A Box


Growing up I was a really shitty student. Every year on the days leading up to the first day of school I would tell myself how this year was gonna be different. This would be the year I would show up to class, and even do my homework. Eh. We all break promises.
Unfortunately, there seems to be a pattern to my behavior. Every morning I am going to eat right that day, exercise even! Every Friday I am going to put some money aside, not spend what little money I earn willy-nilly so that when rent comes around I'm taking the change into Coinstar. Every time I clean the litter-box is the last time I let it get that bad--from now on, I am going to clean it everyday! And when I started this blog I wasn't going to be one of those "one-hit wonders," those "everyone else is doing it, I may as well join in-ers," I was going to post insightful, meaningful, and humorous content every day! So, my apologies dear reader(s) (?). From now on this blog is gonna be better, fresher, newer, and with more stain fighting power.
But if you'd just indulge me for a bit by letting me make an excuse for my inactivity, I'd like to point out that the problem is my job. It's uninspiring. It's monotonous. It's predictable. It's dull. Yes, it does provide me with plenty of free time, but it leaves me with only enough energy to contemplate what my next move is and how much longer I can last there.
Please don't tell anyone I work with. They are all very nice people. Well, nearly all of them--there is that one asshole, and that cranky old bag, and that woman who's rarely there what with her "sick kid," and who even when she is there can't manage to smile. And that says a lot coming from me. I have a hard time turning this frown upside down but am able to manage the task every once in awhile. In the end those people don't even matter. 92% of all my time is spent sectioned off away from my co-workers. I even have headphones on and listen to music lest I have to hear any of their voices. We see each other in the cafeteria come lunch time, but still manage to avoid conversing with each other while we all face the one 19" TV hanging in the corner tuned into CNN with no volume on. Then at quitting time, we tip-toe out in the fear that someone might notice it's a few minutes before the hour and make a comment about our "leaving early nearly everyday" to the wrong person.
I hear it's different with the smokers. Now that we're all sufficiently grossed out by cigarette smoke and totally offended by the puffing perpetrators they've managed to band together in a designated outdoor area and talk about the rest of us while they figure out what it takes to move ahead.
It is as Billy Corgan says it is: Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage.
Well, I see that it's 9:56. Better get to bed, gotta get up early tomorrow morning.