It's All Good

I'm approaching my one month anniversary #vegetarianism #nocokes (I'm on Twitter now). And I can honestly say, it's been easier than Jeff said it would be. I broke down and had fried cheese sticks again last Sunday. While fried mozzarella is well within the guidelines of vegetarianism and no sodaism, what's the point if you're going to eat like shit? So I said to Jeff (and myself; mostly myself) "I need to cut out the fried foods!" Then Tuesday I made these kick ass flash-fried green beans but I didn't feel bad about it b/c they weren't breaded. I know that's not the point, but I find lying to myself helpful these days. Since my last blog I tried this fake meat stuff called Quorn, which is a nonsensical and misleading name for a food product made from mushrooms, or some kind of fungi.

I'm pretty sure I had this years ago when I had some vegetarian roommates. They made a fake meat Shepherd's Pie which was the first Shepherd's Pie I ever had and, consequently, my favorite. I mixed it into pasta sauce b/c I was tired and eating well is more (as I've bitched about before) than just sound food choices, it's also grocery shopping and cooking and cleaning...after work. So anyway I was tired and didn't want to do anything that would take more than 15 minutes so I made a "meat" sauce and boiled up some rigatoni. It was a hit!Then last night I made some OUTSTANDING (if I do say so myself) veggie enchiladas. I even made the tomatillo sauce (it was just tomatillos, garlic, jalapenos, cilantro and water). The enchiladas themselves were black bean, zuchinni, yellow onion, red pepper and (drum roll please) PURPLE bell pepper! Found them at Whole Foods. I got two purple bell peppers and took a pic but I'm too lazy to connect my phone to my computer so that'll come later (if ever). You can probably find a pic doing a google image search if you were desperate to see them. After all that work, Jeff doused his in store bought salsa and it made remember being a waitress and seeing Chefs get pissed when people would ask for more this or a side of this and it's just like "Will you fucking try it first?!" In other related news, I was really hoping drinking more water and cutting out on sodas and sweets would keep me from breaking out every month before my period but that hasn't happened. I went and foolishly spent $15 on tea tree oil based cleansing pads and spot treatment (again, Whole Foods). I woke up the next morning looking like I had the measles. Should've never bought that magnifying mirror.

I Don't Eat Hot Dogs

So I'm nearing the end of Day 10 and things are going pretty good. I've had two regrettable days as far as food choices go: one I had onion rings, the other fried mozzarella cheese sticks (both so good! {Pappadeaux}). I felt like shit after, though. It's funny because I didn't realize how much I would miss just fat. I especially didn't think I'd miss it more than sugar. I'm really happy about the decrease in my sugar consumption, though. I had an interesting conversation with a girl I work with about her diabetes. She said before she got her blood sugar under control her moods were unpredictable and up and down. I don't know why I hadn't heard that or thought about that before. I was on anti-depressants for nearly a year for an 'anxiety disorder" and was thinking of getting back on them once my insurance at work kicks in, but now I'm waiting to see if my anxiety and depression are just products of mood swings related to my sugar intake. I'm also excited about finally being an adult about my food choices and trying new foods. When I told Jennifer about my recent decision to become a vegenish vegetarian she was excited about it and knew of a vegan restaurant we could try. We did, and it was pretty good. Pretty, pretty good. Too bad it's got such a horrible name.

Vegeria = Vagina or Vaginaria. A few days after our lunch at Vag Central, we tried a Thai place she'd heard about that was SO.FA.KING.GOOD. Which reminds me, I had some tempura there so there was the third time I've had fried food on my vegetarian diet. Anyway, I had this spicy eggplant tofu dish that was tasty. And look how cute their menu is:

SA- WASS- DEEEE!! But BY FAR the biggest issue I'm having with this new way of eating is access to the right foods. Lots of trips to the store, and the store by me sucks. Lots of having to cook. Can't just order shit and have it delivered or go pick it up. Can't just pack up a microwave dinner. Now that I'm thinking about it, the real issue is me not having a car. Not having a car sucks! That commercial really nailed it. In July we had a "Hot Dog Potluck" at my work. I sent out a flyer to the entire staff (approx 130 ppl) letting them know about it. Fidelia replied all: I don't eat hot dogs. No shit, Fidelia? Me either.

High Five

I'm just two days away from a full week of no cokes, meat, eggs; and just a touch of cheese and cream. Oh--and no processed foods. Hold on...I'm having to rethink this. I bought some scones that come in one of those biscuit type cylindrical cans that pop open when you twist them. They weren't pillsbury or anything; they were organic and all natural. Still, I'm sure I consumed some egg and I'm not sure that wasn't processed food. In fact, I'm not really sure what "processed" means. But I ordered the companion book to the movie Forks Over Knives, and that's supposed to tell me. It's like how some religious people believe if you're unaware that what you're doing is a sin while you're doing it, you're not really sinning. See how convenient rationalization is?? Today for lunch I had a frozen Amy's Mexican Casserole. It was organic, which made me feel good about it. And it contained tofu, which I usually don't like but was fine with here. Maybe because I just wanted something other than a vegetable so bad. I also had some chips and salsa. There's a small and shitty cafeteria on the first floor of my building and I was really wanting a drink other than water so I went down to see if they had something without high fructose corn syrup and, as I suspected, they had some some Sweetleaf Tea. I bought some; it sucked. I used to drink a ton of that stuff. Maybe I got a bottle from a bad batch or something.

I don't have a car so depend on rides from whoever but mainly Jeff on his scooter. He never wants to take me anywhere. I got home from work and we chatted about cars (he went and looked at used Pathfinder for me--it was a piece of shit. That's what happens on a budget of $5k). Then it was like 7:00 and I was like "Take me to the store!!" I was thinking about sweet potatoes so I bought some. I also got some onion, cauliflower and asparagus. I tossed 'em all in some grapeseed oil (the only kind I have b/c my friend who's a chef said it goes with everything) and I thought I had some oregano but I didn't so I used this Tony's all-spice stuff. Put that shit in the oven (the sweet potatoes for 30 minutes, then the rest of the shit of another 20) and served it up. Jeff loved it. After dinner I made myself sick on chocolate covered peanuts. I'm so bloated. Oh, also I discovered that my lemonade and topo chico blend well together!

At the store while in line at the checkout I noticed one of the rags had a pic of a very young pageant girl--I suspect from that Toddlers and Tiaras or whatever show. I go "Jeff, look." And he goes "Ooh. She's hot." I'll find the pic...FOUND IT!

An Offer I Can Refuse

Today I took a big salad to work along with a separate container of corn and beans that I'd sprinkled with cumin and garlic powder and microwaved. I added the warmed up beans and corn to the salad with some salsa and didn't enjoy it nearly as much as I thought I would. I should have stuck with chickpeas or black beans--instead I went with pinto. Pintos only work when you fry them, then fry them again. As I was forcing it down I was reading my Foer book and hit the part where he starts talking about eating dogs. I got sick to my stomach. The beans made me think of what refried beans look like in a can (even though there weren't refried), and then that made me think of dog food (which is gross) and then he's talking about cooking and eating dogs. It was all so, so very wrong. I don't think in a book promoting vegetarianism you do your argument any good by asking why we don't eat dog. Just before lunch I'd gotten a call from a corporate recruiter at my job offering me the full time administrative assistant to the VP of Healthcare Operations position. This position is the one I have now, I'm just a temp. Her "offer" included a pay increase of one dollar. While many people would greet such an offer enthusiastically, I was irritated. I know the other two dummies I work with make more than that. I don't know a number, but I know a number that one of them scoffed at--and that laughable number was seventy five cents more than what was offered me. Plus I do way more work than the other two ding-dong assistants in the office. So that was that. I stumbled over my own words and didn't know how to say "WTF? AW HELL NO!" so I was like "Well, that's less than the other assistants in the office earn." Which prompted the question "How do you know that? Discussing salary is against policy." Stammer, stammer, stammer... So that happened. I was super busy at work, too, because I'm always volunteering to help other people because I hate being bored. When I got home, I was pooped and still a little wound up and Jeff hadn't eaten "ALL DAY!" and so he wanted pizza which indicates how supportive he is when I say "I need to eat better." I said fuck that, but it really sounded good. So twice today two ordinarily irresistible offers were an affront to my person. Luckily I remembered I had some spicy tomato sauce and pasta. Thank god for Plan Bs. If you're not prepared, it's nearly impossible to stick with a plant-based/non processed food diet b/c there's no such thing as good fast food, at least not around my neighborhood. There was a fast food salad place in Austin. I really miss Austin. I'm thinking if I pick a day that represents getting over the hump I can count down to it and therefore have something to look forward to. 30 days sounds about right. Today is the end of day four. Twenty six days to go before I'm a pro at this shit.

Day Three

I wish talking about my attempt at eliminating foods from animals and foods that are processed was more entertaining. I really love a good title, and I just couldn't think of one. In any event, here's how my day went: I had coffee with no cream today. It was iced; don't think I could do it hot. I didn't finish it, either. But I discovered it's doable, so that's exciting. Tonight at the grocery store I bought hazelnut flavored soy creamer...maybe the end result of that will be equally exciting. Aside from a pat of butter on my bread at dinner, it was a vegan day. So I'm sticking with the vegetarian plus the occasional unavoidable bit of dairy plan. During lunch (spicy vegetable soup) I was able to get in a few more pages of Eating Animals. Foer, or Safron Foer (whatever), spends a considerable amount of time in the first part of the book conveying that his idea with the book was to impart a story about food, and not for it to be a scholarly type work promoting vegetarianism. I can't imagine it not having that effect, though. I mean, that's why I downloaded the fucking thing. Nevertheless, I am enjoying it. He does a good job spelling out the emotional attachment we have to different foods. This is what's always frustrated me about people who think losing weight simply involves a little willpower. What we eat, why we eat, how much we eat, etc--these are all things influenced by our upbringing. Foer does a good job illustrating how much his grandmother's cooking and her attitude toward food affected him. It made me think of one of the first things Jeff said when I told him we should quit eating meat: "Think about Thanksgiving." I'd rather not, right now. Right now it's important for me to think of all the ways I want to improve my health and how changing my diet will help me do that. I've already noticed that I'm not completely sluggish and irritable around 3pm everyday. Now I just need: perfect skin, more energy, a better memory, a smaller waist, to get rid of the dark circles under my eyes, and to improve my mood. Among other things. Sorry this post wasn't funny--that's what the pic is for.

From Vegan to Vegetarian in 12 Hours

This morning it occurred to me that breakfast as a vegan was going to be super challenging. Like I said, I'm not a big cook. At 7am, I'm even less of one. I saw a lot of recipes online for vegan pancakes--but I've never even successfully made non-vegan, regular old, out of a box pancakes. Besides that, there's only one thing I want to do before I go to work in the morning: sleep. Right before I get to work I like to stop and get coffee...with cream...and a pastry. Having this conversation with my boyfriend, he suggested that rather than go "hardcore" vegan, I just refrain from going out of my way to eat animal based foods. I agreed. Then we went to La Madeline and I had a potato galette and coffee with the tiniest bit of cream. I told myself it would be OK because eventually I would have my coffee at home with almond or soy milk--or even go black (you know what they say...) Today at lunch was fine. I packed a salad and I like salads so it wasn't a big deal. I added avocado to try and make it more special and filling. At lunch I sat alone with my Nook, wanting to get into a book I just downloaded: Jonathon Safron Foer's Eating Animals. Think it'll be some good reinforcement. We'll see. I wasn't able to read because a Swiss girl I work with sat down with me, then eventually two other co-workers. We ended up talking about football and I said, despite everything he did, I'm rooting for Michael Vick (he paid he's fucking dues! Give him a break. He was into something that was culturally acceptable where he grew up) and the Swiss girl (who knew nothing about football) said "Oh, I HATE him! I cannot stand people who abuse animals!" while she ate a ham sandwich. Before I left work I started googling vegan recipes and printed up a couple "hearty stews" ones. When I got home I had Jeff pick and he said "Whatever." Then he took me up to the shitty grocery store near here where I was shocked to find some organic vegetable stock (their entire produce dept has not one organic fruit or vegetable...not one!). I made a spicy vegetable soup with hot rotel and cumin and cayenne and chili powder (and potatoes and carrots and celery...the usual). It was pretty good. Jeff liked it, which says a lot b/c despite the fact that he's never cooked EVER and when I do he's always telling me that the meal needed a "little more" of this or a "little less" of that. Anyway, one good thing I've noticed is that shopping for vegan/vegetarian (I had some butter w/ my bread) meals is easy (you just stay in one dept) and cheap (My most expensive item was a $5 bottle of wine that was on sale), so that's cool. I'd take a picture of my stew and post it but: I'm too lazy; and vegetable soup looks like vegetable soup. Something else I've found that helps keep up this diet is looking disgustingly at others who don't eat well and telling myself I'm better than them. Just as an FYI.


 Links!
http://www.amazon.com/Eating-Animals-Jonathan-Safran-Foer/dp/0316069884/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1315882516&sr=8-1
http://www.amazon.com/Forks-Over-Knives-Plant-Based-Health/dp/1615190457/ref=sr_1_2?
ie=UTF8&qid=1315883500&sr=8-2
http://www.gq.com/sports/profiles/201109/michael-vick-gq-september-2011-interview

So it's been, just to guesstimate, 224 days since I've updated my blog. I don't even come here--I hate staring my own failure in the face. Still, my apologies to you, reader, I'm not giving it up completely. About a week before I turned 40 I was watching some really lame TV (I don't have cable) and heard this expression I'd (somehow) never heard before: "You leave your 40s the same way you enter them." I'm sure this means absolutely nothing, but as I neared and reached 40 I began worrying about my health and thought "Fuck, if I keep going at this rate I'll be 300 lbs at 50!" So I've decided it's time I at least make an effort to eat healthy and exercise. And when I say "it's TIME", I mean "time's approaching." I'd heard an interview a month or so ago with this doctor in his late 70s who was still working and doing his best to promote a plant-based/animal free (vegan), no processed foods diet. I never gave this viewpoint much credence. I was convinced that all one needed to live a long and healthy life was to enjoy "moderation in all things." So all I had to do was quit being excessive. So simple a step that I'd never done it. EVER. Anyway, this morning I was browsing through my Netflix instant watch options and saw the documentary that doctor has participated in/was promoting. I watched it. I became convinced. As of this moment, as of today--I'm a vegan. I never cook because I suck at it (probably because I never do it), so I know this is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done, ok, TRIED to do. And I've been online looking for cookbooks and blogs and testimonials, etc and while I'm sure it's out there I have yet to find a blog about how to change your mindset and how to get over the mental effects of giving up every bad food habit that you've had and loved forever. So I decided that I could just write about it my damn self. Today I'm excited about it. I've struggled with depression and anxiety and fatigue and I tend to believe that you are what you eat so I can't wait to see if my mood improves as well. Anyway, I'm giving it the college try but I may fail and if I do you'll be the first to know. Wish me luck! Check out what I checked out today! (the film that started it all)